Not sure if she’s getting fingered or had a bad burrito
On Saturday, the Saints and the Colts square off in the third of four preseason games in Indianapolis. While this marks the first time since 2011 that the teams played each other, a 62-7 beating by the Saints, the two teams of course are forever entwined due in part to Super Bowl 44.
That being said, as a person that grew up a Colts fan and saw the light thanks to an episode of Real World New Orleans in which the gang celebrated with the good people of the Crescent City in the wake of the Saints’ Super Bowl win, I decided to share some truths about the Colts fanbase and organization.
1. Peyton Manning is only reason why Tony Dungy could be headed to Canton
Not too long ago, I wrote that Mike Smith’s teams in Atlanta was heading down the same path as Tony Dungy’s teams in Tampa Bay (great regular seasons, terrible postseasons).
The year after Dungy leaves Tampa Bay, Jon Gruden comes in and wins a Super Bowl, making Brad Johnson look like Drew Brees.
Dungy goes to Indianapolis, has Peyton Manning as his QB, and the rest is history.
If Peyton wasn’t QB in Indianapolis, Dungy wouldn’t be considered for anything.
2. Going to a Colts home game is like going to a church service
For some stupid reason, the Colts retired a number for their fans (think a lamer version of the 12th man in Seattle) prior to the team leaving the RCA Dome in 2007.
As opposed to the Superdome, games at the RCA Dome, much like the ones at the Metrodome, were like three-hour church services. Even when the team moved to Lucas Oil Stadium in 2008, the fans in Indianapolis were still without regard the quietest in the NFL.
3. Jim Harbaugh is in the Ring of Honor
I know Saint fans were up in arms about Aaron Brooks getting into the team’s Hall of Fams, but Jim Harbaugh’s induction into the Colts Ring of Honor over guys like Bert Jones (the last QB drafted by the team to win a playoff game before Peyton) and Ken Dilger always puzzled me.
In the short time Harbaugh was in the Circle City (the nickname comes from Monument Circle which is like Lee Circle in New Orleans), the Colts posted back-to-back 9-7 seasons and basically tanked in 1997 to get the #1 pick in the 1998 draft.
4. Never date a female Colt fan.
During Super Bowl 41, my then-girlfriend, who moved to Memphis from Shelbyville, Indiana in August of 2006, and I went to a Super Bowl party in the suburbs of Memphis. Due to the fact that she was a Colts fan, I figured that she would be as rabid as I was.
The most excitement that she excreted that night was clapping furiously at the end of the game.
We broke up three weeks later.
5. Peyton Manning masked a lot of things
If you placed Peyton Manning in Atlanta, Cincinnati, Detroit, Baltimore or even Dallas, your team more than likely wins 11-14 games off the bat.
More importantly, the presence of Manning masks a lot of things that could be wrong with your team’s front office.
As opposed to what the Broncos did in 2012, the Colts never made an effort to draft Manning’s successor.
As one person put it to me a couple of years ago, the Colts is probably the only franchise that has lucked into getting two Hall of Fame quarterbacks.
6. Only people in Indiana think the Colts-Patriots rivalry is still a fierce rivalry
As a Saints fan, you’re taught early on that the football team in Atlanta is the enemy, that even dating a fan of that team is off limits.
Growing up as a Colts fan, it was hard for me to buy into the notion that the Patriots was supposed to be a rival.
If anything the “rivalry” was akin to Kobe going one-on-one with Lebron.
Or even better, the Pacers-Heat rivalry.
But go anywhere around central Indiana and Colt fans will try to sell you on the notion that the Patriots are their rivals.
7. The Colts are the Atlanta Braves of the NFL
In the last 20 years, the Braves have made the postseason 14 times, winning three National League pennants and the 1995 World Series.
As of 2014, the Braves haven’t won a playoff series since 1999, when they dispatched the Houston Astros in the Division Series.
Despite the fact that the Colts won eight straight division titles from 2003 to 2010 and appeared in two Super Bowls, they went one and done four times in the postseason. In fact, in Peyton Manning’s 13 years with the Colts, the team went one and done seven times in the postseason.
By comparison, Brett Favre went one and done three times in the playoffs in his career.
8. The Colts Way is bullshit
While some may think that the Saints got lucky with signing Drew Brees and hiring Sean Payton, the fact of the matter is that Tom Benson realized that in order to win championships you have to spend money, which explains why he has a Lombardi Trophy.
In the case of the Colts, as much as the people in central Indiana don’t want to admit, the franchise’s way of doing things is akin to that of a drunken hand of poker. Aside from the draft picks of Peyton and Faulk (who jetted to St. Louis and won a ring) as well as Luck, the “Colts Way” is basically falling backwards to the point in which you hit rock bottom and pray for a miracle.